You want to connect. So do I. In fact, you and I are hardwired for connection. But we don’t want to be vulnerable or expose ourselves to emotional risk. And vulnerability is the only pathway to connection. It’s the oldest Catch 22. And also the most painful. The key is courageous conversations. Saying the one […]
How to stop approval whoring
A listener once sent me an email asking me to stop using the word whore as it was derogatory. The old me was an approval whore. The old me would have immediately agreed with her without even considering what I thought. But the new me is a recovering approval whore, so I play by […]
How to protect yourself
How to protect yourself when someone is trying to hurt you. When someone is in their own shame storm they are prone to try to hurt you or hook you. When this happens first off notice how you are feeling. Do you feel shame? Do you want to react by fleeing, fighting or freezing? That would […]
Happy Anniversary to us! A way to be brave.
Happy 7th Anniversary to us!!! How She Really Does It has been on the airwaves + traveling the internet since October 2006. Wow! What started out as a small inner quest has grown into a life changing event. Thank you for being a part of this incredible journey. Starting out 7 years ago, I never imagined […]
I did not serve me!
I was heading to sleep when in my inbox I received an invitation. I signed up. I spent the next hour on my iPad surfing around a bunch of boards. I still would not commit to post anything. [My perfectionism can get in the way at the silliest times]. Finally at 11:14 pm I turned […]
All or Nothing
Many of my clients are overachievers who have an “all or nothing” mindset. They want to do things perfectly. And if they can not do it pefectly they decide not to do it at all. Doing it all is NOT sustainable. You will NOT be able to do it ALL, all of the time. If […]
“Bad Foods”
In our society we are taught that some foods are “bad foods.” Foods without nutritional content that hurt our bodies, etc. We are told: If we want to lose weight we must not eat these foods. If we want to be healthy we can not eat them. That if we are disciplined enough we will […]
I am a Tiger Daughter….
I am a Tiger Daughter. I was raised by a Tiger Mom. What did that mean for me? It meant that perfection was ABSOLUTE, mistakes were not tolerated. Emotions and happiness could wait. Success was dependent on achievement. Mistakes would be a permanent scar that would always follow me. Welcome to my childhood. Yes my […]
The Power of a Group
This fall I had the honor to work with a group of women. They came to learn and improve themselves. They also had different fears or concerns that made them apprehensive about this commitment they were making. What happened at the end of our time together? They were shocked by how far they had come. […]
Goals – what happens when you reach them
A week ago I achieved one of my major (personal) life goals. I had set this goal about 17 years ago. At the time it was a dream. I had not even started on the first part of my journey. I only had an idea or vision of what I wanted for myself. I did […]
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