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Self-help is a lie

April 12, 2022 by Koren Motekaitis

We used to have a Borders bookstore in Davis. One of my favorite things to do on a date night was head over to the bookstore after our dinner. I didn’t have a clue where my husband headed. I always headed for the self-help section.  The idea of self-help was enticing. It was my way, […]

Filed Under: Lifestyle, Personal Empowerment

Writing your next chapter

April 5, 2022 by Koren Motekaitis

I have a long held belief … there has got to be a better way. I hated the movie As Good as it Gets with Jack Nicholson and Helen Hunt. I believe in being a deliberate creator in our life. I believe in possibilities for all of us. Not just those who have had great […]

Filed Under: Conversations with Koren, Courage

Leaving the cult of perfectionism

March 29, 2022 by Koren Motekaitis

You’ve been told, “Be perfect and you’ll be safe.” Our culture promotes “Be perfect to be loved.” We’ve been lied to. Perfection is not the path to love + belonging. When you are trying to be perfect you are actually cultivating a persona of who you think you’re supposed to be — based on who […]

Filed Under: Worthiness

Does “nice” mean cupcakes???

March 22, 2022 by Koren Motekaitis

As a young female leader, I made a decision about how I would lead. I could be “nice.” If I did that, I would be walked all over, while also being responsible for bringing cupcakes for my employee’s birthdays. Or, I could be a “bitch.”  Then I would not have to be responsible for bringing […]

Filed Under: Work

Self-hatred is alive and well

March 15, 2022 by Koren Motekaitis

Listen carefully. People say the meanest things about themselves all the time. There’s just too much fat here to lift my leg to my chest. I’m lazy. I didn’t want to because it’s too hard and I’m not tough enough. I take the path of least resistance because I’m not capable. I’m irritated with myself […]

Filed Under: Shame

Is there any other option?

March 8, 2022 by Koren Motekaitis

Compassion is the biggest motivator for change. Compassion is the pathway to growth … and to blowing your mind about what’s possible for YOU. This is counter to the culture. We were taught to beat ourselves up. To hate on ourselves. To make ourselves small. And then, maybe, you will achieve! That’s totally wrong. And […]

Filed Under: Mindset

Understanding vs. Knowing

March 1, 2022 by Koren Motekaitis

I was coaching a new client today. She’s reading Brené Brown’s latest book Dare to Lead. She is struggling with her leadership role as the Executive Director (ED) of a non-profit and one of the dedicated volunteers who is challenging my client’s leadership. After I coached her, she realized that simply reading the information was […]

Filed Under: Career, Motivation

You know what to do. But you aren’t doing it.

February 22, 2022 by Koren Motekaitis

You’ve been around here listening to the podcast How She Really Does It: The Place Where Inspiration + Possibility Meet for a while now. You’ve been an engaged reader of my SUNDAY LOVE email. You know what to do. I’ve given you the coaching tools … yet you still aren’t doing it. You don’t make […]

Filed Under: Conversations with Koren

End the mighty war with yourself

February 15, 2022 by Koren Motekaitis

You have battled yourself. You have tried to assassinate your flawed self, hoping to resurrect a “good person.” You’ve gone to war with yourself by attacking yourself with hatred. But it didn’t work. Stop the battle. Stop the assassination. Stop the war with yourself, it will never work. HOW TO STOP THE WAR WITH YOURSELF […]

Filed Under: Personal Empowerment

Busy

February 8, 2022 by Koren Motekaitis

One of the lies we tell ourselves is that if we stay busy enough, we can outrun our pain. The pain comes from the stories inside ourselves. You know … that voice in the back of your head that keeps saying all those mean things about you? Busy is a way to numb and distract […]

Filed Under: Career, Children & Family, Lifestyle

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About Koren

Hello, I am Koren. I am a real person just like you.  I practice living my life in alignment with who I am, even if that means I am different. I show up and do the work too! I am okay and so are you. I am a mother, wife, family member, friend, entrepreneur and community builder ... learn more

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