howshereallydoesit.com

You did what you were told to do

by

You did what you were told to do! You worked hard. You did what others wanted you to do. You put others first. You cared about other people’s opinions over your own. You became highly educated to prove your worthiness. You over (and over and over) achieve at work in order to prove your worthiness. […]

How to become the next version of YOU

by

We are always a work in progress. One of the big lies we’ve been told is “one day – out there – we will arrive.” Then, when that someday arrives, we will finally be good enough and can rest. HA! You must practice becoming the next version of yourself and also rest.  Hence, why you […]

I grew up poor

by

I grew up poor.  I thought having “the things I was supposed to have” would allow me to finally be worthy of love + belonging.  This was unfortunately my thinking at the ripe old age of 10 years old. Wow! Back in the 1980s, Minnetonka Moccasin shoes were a must have item for girls. I […]

You’re worthy right now

by

Yes, I know you’ve heard it before … you’re worthy as you are, right now, right here. But you don’t believe it. In fact you don’t believe you’re worthy of love + belonging just as you are. You’ve been living by made up rules that promise worthiness:     you must be accomplished     you must be a […]

The stories we tell ourselves

by

When my clients first come to me, they think it’s because of their circumstances – the job, the relationship, the money, the weight. But really, it comes down to the stories they tell themselves. My amazing, smart, brilliant, beautiful, strong, and capable clients come to me with the stories of not being enough. You know […]

Confidence is an inside job

by

Intellectually, you understand it’s important for you to take care of yourself … but you still find yourself prioritizing pleasing other people over your own needs (I call this “approval whoring”). You want to be your own best friend … but you spend a lot of time criticizing and hating yourself. You want to be […]

I am not responsible for how you feel

by

My clients often get in their own way because they’re worried about how they will make others feel. Here’s the thing: You are not responsible for how others feel, you are only responsible for the energy you bring. Years ago, I was at the Daring Way™ training with some colleagues. One of their partners is […]

Resentment is corrosive

by

You say “YES” when you really want to say “NO.” You are afraid that if you don’t “people please” people will leave you. Here’s the thing.  You’re so busy considering what other people think of you + what they think you should do. That you haven’t given thought or space to what you want to […]

My favorite foods

by

Food. It’s all I thought about. My next meal. Where? When? How? It was seductive.   I wanted to eat what I wanted. I didn’t want to follow anyone else’s rules. I tuned out so much in my life, just to think about my next meal. My favorite meal was the “forbidden meal.”  It could be […]

Inspiring stories, tips, & takeaways delivered weekly with a smile.