You think it’s your life situations that create your worthiness. The truth is your lack of worthiness doesn’t come from: Your job. Your horrible boss. Your marital status. How much money you don’t make. The number on the scale. Ready to know what creates your worthiness? The thoughts you believe over and over about yourself […]
When I was a junior in college, I secretly pursued a HUGE GOAL for myself. I wanted to be a National Champion in the 200 yard butterfly at the Division II NCAA’s. I told no one. Because I could not risk failure and losing “face” if it did not come true. But that’s another discussion. […]
Whenever I do something completely new (something I don’t have a lot of confidence in and/or have no control over the outcome) I often notice: The tight shoulders. The pressure. The mental drama in my brain. The procrastination. The busyness that doesn’t accomplish anything. The voice in the back of my head that says you […]
You can’t act with confidence when you hate yourself. That would not be confidence, it would be a lie. Let’s look at the definition of confidence: the state of feeling certain about the truth of something. a feeling of self-assurance arising from one’s appreciation of one’s own abilities or qualities. the feeling or belief that […]
Years ago, I interviewed Peter Walsh and he told me the key to his success: Commit 100%, totally commit. Be absolutely all-in. Wow. 100% commitment means no room for wobble or self-doubt. Peter then shared his second key to success: Re-evaluate in 6 months. This isn’t for the rest of your life. The 6 months […]
Stop waiting. This life is not a practice run. This is real. Don’t ask for permission. Instead, give yourself your own permission. Manage risk, then go after what you want. Here’s what this looks like … One of my clients wants a new career path. She’s a highly skilled and respected executive. She has a […]
A couple of years ago I found myself in a group email thread where a male swim coach was trying to stop me from using my voice. He did not like that I was asking hard questions, that I was willing to use my voice to speak to our governing body. Have you ever found […]
My client used busy as a status symbol for happiness. If she was busy, she thought, she could prove to others she was worthy … and therefore would be happy. Sure, busy fills up that vulnerable white space we covet, but are so afraid of because we are then alone with ourselves. If you don’t […]
I’m blown away at the life I’ve created for myself. If you don’t know my story, I was a girl who once believed “she was a loser born on loser street.” I grew up poor in an alcoholic home. My parents really loved us … however there was just a lot, a whole lot, of […]
I want someone to feel sorry for me. So someone will rescue me. I want the white knight to come and fix my problem. So I don’t have to be vulnerable (uncertainty, emotional exposure + risk). I want the imaginary white knight because then I can bet on “him” instead of me. So I don’t […]