It’s so fascinating. You know a lot of people. You have a lot of friends on FB. Yet … you still feel alone. You want a place to belong. You hunger for friendship. You tell yourself stories that these women you admire, they already have a lot of friends. You tell yourself, you won’t be […]
Growing up, I was … odd. I was always the tallest girl in my class. I was usually taller than most of the boys. I have dark hair. I have almond eyes. I have broad shoulders (thank you swimming). My mother looked different than the other girls mom’s — my mom was Korean. The cultural […]
You set a goal. You’re excited, at least for a few minutes. Then you get scared out of your mind … What if it doesn’t happen? What if you aren’t good enough to achieve it? Besides, you aren’t someone who ever really gets what she wants. And that’s why you don’t believe you can achieve […]
I actually call it approval whoring. I have a very specific reason for this. People pleasing is misleading and sounds like a NICE thing to do for others. Whore vs. Please. Whore = not acceptable in society. Please = how we, especially as women, are culturally programmed to BE in our lives. Now let’s take […]
Sometimes, you yell at your kids. Sometimes, you lose your cool. Sometimes, you screw up as a parent. My friend, let me assure you, you aren’t the only one. We know what we’re NOT supposed to do …yell at others, lose our cool, and definitely not screw up. But we are all human. Stop beating […]
My clients work hard. They consider themselves high-achievers. In fact, they take that high achieving and over do it when they don’t believe they are worthy. Worthy of what you ask? Worthy of love. Worthy of belonging. Worthy of simply being enough. This is when my clients dial up this awful feeling of shame and […]
On my podcast you may have heard me say … Be the LEADER of your life. This is one of my main messages for my clients, the listeners of How She Really Does It and you here reading this. Being the leader of your life is part of what I call “adulting.” When we were […]
You have high standards. You want to excel. You believe the pathway to excellence is to beat yourself up. You believe that if you are critical of yourself … you’ll finally shape up and be better. How’s it working for you? Keep your high standards. It’s awesome that you want to excel … we are […]
You don’t want to feel it. You’ve tried to outrun it. You’ve tried to numb it. My friend, the thing you don’t want to feel is a painful feeling of anxiety (or replace anxiety with your painful feeling – FEAR, SHAME, SADNESS, etc) … Yes, it’s uncomfortable. But there is a way out that is […]
You hear their voices. You worry about what other people think. You let others stop you from doing what you want. You don’t speak up, because you’re afraid of what others will think. It’s time to let go of other people’s opinions. While you may mistakenly believe this allows you to be safe, you’ve allowed […]