My client was in tears. I asked her, “Do you want to fit in … or belong.” Her response surprised me. “I want to fit in.” Fitting in is an attempt at making yourself who you think others want you to be. Belonging is showing up fully as your complete messy + lovable self. She […]
Choose what you believe about yourself
When I ask people what they believe about themselves, they say things like this … I am hard working. I care deeply. I must work really hard. I never get it all done. I am not lovable. I can’t have what I really want. I will never be enough. What do you believe about […]
Making mistakes DOES NOT make you a failure
You need to stop believing that making mistakes makes you a failure. I realize we have been taught that mistakes equal an “F” in school … however, my friend, this is life, not the rules of school. Mistakes are lessons learned … and we all go through them (and even need them). Yes, all of […]
10 Ways to Practice Gratitude
We know we’re supposed be practicing gratitude, yet we still don’t do it. Instead of wasting precious hours of your life trying to analyze why (or feeling guilt about it), how about getting right down to a few simple ways of actually doing it? Here are 10 ways you can practice your gratitude … Allow […]
Why are you living in a swamp?
Do you overindulge in the drama of your life? When a friend calls, do you start the conversation with what’s not going well? Most people live in the swampland of shame, because they don’t know any better. Instead of focusing on where they want to go, they talk about how horrible it is to live […]
All, or nothing at all
One of my clients had a belief … that her partner must be 100% honest (100% of the time) to be in a loving + connected relationship. As you can imagine, this belief led to difficult and short relationships … until she realized that she herself couldn’t live up to her own demands. Another client […]
The one thing it takes to truly live this thing called LIFE.
Shame is what threatens your place of love + belonging. When you struggle with shame — and we all do — you can: Try to outrun it. However, it is always there. Wherever you are, there it is, inside of you. Sell yourself out in order to please others in your life. While we think […]
Keep your eyes on the road
When you’re learning how to drive a car, you’re not also learning how to cook at the same time. In that moment, you’re focused on the driving (or, you should be!). In your life, how often do you focus on one thing or try to do multiple things at the same time? Commit to one […]
Stop letting numbers determine your worth
Isn’t it fascinating how we give so much power to certain numbers in our life? The number on the scale The number in your bank account The number on your tax return Those numbers have power because you’ve bought into a cultural belief that those numbers validate your worth. Big fat lie!!! The number on […]
Who hates Koren?
“Who hates Koren?” Those three words used to cause me so much pain and suffering. When I was in fifth grade, I received a note after library class with those three words listed at the top of the paper, along with signatures of my classmates. CRUSHING to anyone, especially this shy, insecure 10 year […]
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