Let’s say you have a friend who’s fierce. She is strong and capable. Do you ever reach out to her to see how she’s really doing? Might be a tough thing to do. Since she’s strong and capable, she may not be used to letting you in. But here’s the thing, we all need to […]
No one is allowed to drown
My clients often put up a lot of resistance to committing to their best case scenario. They tend to throw a lot of “but …” sentences out there, reasons why they can’t possibly commit. To help them overcome this resistance, I share ideas about committing to the best case scenario, while also managing risk. During […]
Overcoming Obstacles
A couple of obstacles parents have told me about recently … “My daughter didn’t want to put on her new suit for swim practice.” “My teen wasn’t happy about getting out of bed for the swim meet.” What causes people pain is the belief that obstacles shouldn’t be happening. While the parent of a teen […]
How to Become the Badass Version of Yourself
Being a more badass version of yourself isn’t about being cocky or arrogant. It’s about you being YOU. It’s about you returning to yourself. It’s taking off all the damn armour you’ve accumulated over the years. You know … Perfectionism Judgement Hiding Self-sabotage Being afraid to fully embrace joy in your life Sarcasm Approval whoring, […]
Rewriting your story
In my swimming world, I am faced with a lot of obstacles surrounding “the story of swim meets.” Years ago, Dan Pink and I had a discussion about swim meets. He did not like them, “you spent all day and if you weren’t paying attention, could miss your child’s 14 second race.” Unfortunately, while Dan […]
Your next shit storm is right around the corner. Are you prepared?
It’s a lie to believe you can somehow set up a life free of shit storms. The storm is coming … are you prepared? Shit storms are where growth occurs and transformation can happen. Your brain tells you to play it safe … “No shit storms allowed.” However, without them you’d stagnate, and you don’t […]
If you don’t believe in yourself, who will?
The greatest thing you can do is believe in yourself. Think about it for a moment. If you don’t believe in yourself, who will? Often, my clients are upset. They believe it’s because of other people’s judgement of them, but it’s really that they have an unconscious rule they live by. This rule is “their […]
You’re NOT doing it wrong.
There’s a voice inside you that you disregard. Instead of listening to your own voice, you listen to the voices of others … people you may not even know. Then you tell yourself — because your voice is different than the others — “you’re doing it wrong.” STOP DOING THAT (I say this with lots […]
Confusing belonging with fitting in
My client was in tears. I asked her, “Do you want to fit in … or belong.” Her response surprised me. “I want to fit in.” Fitting in is an attempt at making yourself who you think others want you to be. Belonging is showing up fully as your complete messy + lovable self. She […]
Choose what you believe about yourself
When I ask people what they believe about themselves, they say things like this … I am hard working. I care deeply. I must work really hard. I never get it all done. I am not lovable. I can’t have what I really want. I will never be enough. What do you believe about […]
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