howshereallydoesit.com

Why You Need to Become the BADASS Version of YOURSELF

by

Recently while talking to someone … they asked me about the connection between being ENOUGH and being a BADASS version of YOU … He believed “being ENOUGH was settling. Instead of settling shouldn’t we do more?” That’s always the answer for an overachiever. Do more, do more, do more. The problem … doing more is […]

Our strengths become our biggest weakness

by

You’re a hard worker. You’re a high achiever. You’ve been taught, “Good things happen to those who work hard.” When you don’t think you are ENOUGH … you then go into overdrive and OVERACHIEVE. Work longer hours. Do more for others. Sacrifice yourself for the good of others. THE PROBLEM: You’re exhausted. You’ve literally run […]

The power of taking very small steps

by

I was in constant turmoil. I hated my job. I hated my life. Let’s face it, I hated myself. I had to stop living in the swampland of shame. I had run out of friends who were willing to sit around the campfire while I story fondled all of my woes. Actually, they were tired […]

You’ve been brainwashed (and it’s not your fault)

by

As a kid growing up in a lot of shame, I did not believe I belonged. As an adult, it’s important for me to create environments of inclusive cultures.  The theme song of my life is from the television show Cheers. I have cultivated the AquaMonsters to be a place of belonging.  Our team motto […]

LOVE

by

Movies, songs, tv shows, books, magazines. They’re filled with evidence of the unending quest to find love. The quest for connection. Does your current “state of love” look anything like this artwork by Alexander Milliav? It takes courage to LOVE. It’s so easy to turn our backs on those we love, while at the same […]

Work is taking over your life …

by

You want to do work you love. You want to enjoy your life outside of work, but your work is taking over your life. Did you know all jobs have delightful attributes as well as obstacles to overcome? Yes, there are obstacles. Yes, your job is to overcome them, not flee from them to another […]

The cost of complaining

by

There’s an internal rumbling. It’s uncomfortable. It’s painful. All you want to do is get rid of it. You do that by complaining. You find short-term relief by letting it out. By complaining, you’re offloading your pain onto someone else. It feels good  … kind of like throwing up after a big ole’ tummy ache. […]

Self-hatred is alive and well

by

Any of this sound familiar?   I’ll never be able to achieve [insert your goal]. What’s wrong with me? I work so hard, yet I’m not as successful as [insert the person you compare yourself with] There must be something wrong with me. I hate myself. I hate my life.   Those stories are filled […]

Will you rescue me?

by

I want someone to feel sorry for me. So someone will rescue me. I want the white knight to come and fix my problem. So I don’t have to be vulnerable (uncertainty, emotional exposure + risk). I want the imaginary white knight because then I can bet on “him” instead of me. So I don’t […]

I Love Money

by

I used to hate money. I used to be afraid of money. I believed that money did not come to people like me – the loser from loser street. Here’s the thing, money is neutral.  Money doesn’t cause pain or suffering. In fact, money doesn’t cause happiness either. It’s the commonly accepted stories about money […]

Inspiring stories, tips, & takeaways delivered weekly with a smile.