As a child, I was a shy, quiet girl. I never wanted to demand or impose. I was afraid of rejection so I wouldn’t initiate sleepovers or invite new friends over. I neglected my own inner voice. I taught myself I didn’t matter. In college, I got brave. I started asking people to do things. […]
Where will you be in six months?
Years ago, I interviewed Peter Walsh and he told me the key to his success: Commit 100%, totally commit. Be absolutely all-in. Wow. 100% commitment means no room for wobble or self-doubt. Peter then shared his second key to success: Re-evaluate in 6 months. This isn’t for the rest of your life. The 6 months […]
Honor Commitments to Yourself
The idea of honoring commitments to yourself probably sounds brilliant, or completely ridiculous. Brilliant because when you honor commitments to yourself, you are taking care of yourself. You are getting stuff done. You are proud of yourself. Ridiculous because if you suck at honoring commitments to yourself you have a long list of reasons how […]
Trying vs. Doing
This is what TRY looks like: I’m trying to figure out the foods that fuel my body I’m trying to lose weight I’m trying to date I’m trying to be compassionate with myself I’m trying to lead my team at work. These are some of the things I hear from my clients. I ask, why […]
Shame is the voice of I’m not enough
I’m not enough. I’m a fraud. I don’t know everything. I am too much. I am bad. Sound familiar? They are like those damn junior high friends who always had something not so nice to say in the back of your head. My work with my clients is about becoming shame resilient. This does not […]
What it takes to ACTUALLY change
I used to believe change wasn’t possible for someone like me. Why? Because I had evidence it wasn’t possible. I thought I was working really hard, but I actually wasn’t working at all. I bought books, they sat on my nightstand. I wanted to stop overeating, except for my nightly three bowls of ice cream. […]
Believe in Yourself – this is where it begins
In my own life, since I didn’t believe in myself, I leaned HARD on those who did believe in me. Over time, I exhausted them. I could not accept their belief in me, and would discount and ignore them, and yet keep going back for more validation. I just wanted to be able to see […]
Maybe this is as good as it gets?
Do you remember the 1997 movie As Good as It Gets? Jack Nicholson and Helen Hunt playing people who were settling for a good-enough life. I hated that movie. Because it was my life and I didn’t want to accept it. Even back then, I knew I was climbing the wrong career ladder. I was […]
Say no. And stick to it.
If I say no, people will think I am mean. Only mean people say no. If you believe no = meanness, then you will have a hard time saying no. Your guilt will override your logic and your desires. In order to be able to say no to things you don’t want to do and […]
Choose your words carefully
Choose your words carefully. Your language will have an effect on your energy and can determine the results in your life. I am not talking about your word(s) for the year. I am talking about the words you use in your day to day language. The other day, my client told me she was tired […]