A couple of obstacles parents have told me about recently …
“My daughter didn’t want to put on her new suit for swim practice.”
“My teen wasn’t happy about getting out of bed for the swim meet.”
What causes people pain is the belief that obstacles shouldn’t be happening.
While the parent of a teen is thinking, “look, I’m sacrificing my Saturday to take you to your meet, you should at least appreciate it!”
Instead, of course, the teen would rather sleep in and spend the day on social media.
The little girl who’s not so sure about swimming with the new team makes the new suit the obstacle. Because maybe she can win a victory over her parents and stay home.
Parents often walk up to me frustrated, flustered, and some even become unsure of themselves and their parenting.
There is a gap between what the parent thought was going to happen and what was actually occurring. This gap is what causes pain, suffering, and obstacles.
Byron Katie says, “when you argue with reality you lose 100% of the time.”
The next time you notice things are not going the way you think they’re supposed to be going, don’t argue with reality. Instead, say “of course this is happening.”
You will feel so much better and you’ll stop the shame storm of you thinking you’re a bad parent, spouse, daughter, employee, boss, or friend.
Instead of being in a place of shame, you’ll be rooted in your own worthiness and can overcome the obstacles.
By the way, that little girl got in the pool. Afterwards, she said she really liked her swim practice and coach. She never mentioned anything about the suit.
And the teen who did not want to wake up was very pleasant at the meet, hanging out with his friends, scoring points for the team and challenging himself.
Of course there are obstacles, it’s our opportunity to overcome them.
P.S. What is the key to managing the obstacles in your life? Your mindset. Get my mindset course, Grounded Confidence, right here.