One of the lies we tell ourselves is that if we stay busy enough, we can outrun our pain. The pain comes from the stories inside ourselves. You know … that voice in the back of your head that keeps saying all those mean things about you? Busy is a way to numb and distract […]
My client used busy as a status symbol for happiness. If she was busy, she thought, she could prove to others she was worthy … and therefore would be happy. Sure, busy fills up that vulnerable white space we covet, but are so afraid of because we are then alone with ourselves. If you don’t […]
A couple of obstacles parents have told me about recently … “My daughter didn’t want to put on her new suit for swim practice.” “My teen wasn’t happy about getting out of bed for the swim meet.” What causes people pain is the belief that obstacles shouldn’t be happening. While the parent of a teen […]
Growing up…I believed there was something wrong with me. I was different. I was tall….ALWAYS, even in Kindergarten. I was biracial. My mom is Korean but I don’t look Asian. I was poor. Well not me … but my family didn’t have much financially. Most of my life I felt like the black sheep. I […]
Sometimes, you yell at your kids. Sometimes, you lose your cool. Sometimes, you screw up as a parent. My friend, let me assure you, you aren’t the only one. We know what we’re NOT supposed to do …yell at others, lose our cool, and definitely not screw up. But we are all human. Stop beating […]
You think to create your best life, you must leave your marriage. My clients think the same thing. While I’m not a marriage counselor, I’ve helped heal a lot of painful marriages. You see, we are story making creatures. Our brains love stories. Our brains are fantastic at writing a drama. And if your brain […]
Isn’t it funny? You are a grown ass woman. You have major responsibilities. You are the one that gets things done for others. But you’re waiting for permission. From who? As the responsible, get-shit-done woman, it’s time to give yourself permission … and stop waiting for it to come from someone else. Stop giving your […]
I’ve just returned from one of those life big moments. My husband was inducted in the American Swim Coaches Hall of Fame for his body of work over the past 34 years, developing 2 Olympians ,1 Paralympian, and thousands of others. Over the years I’ve been on “both sides of the curtain.” On the outside […]
You want to change your life. You want to like yourself. You want to work on your personal development. BUT … you don’t have enough time! Let’s get to the root cause of not enough time. “I don’t have enough time” is a limiting belief. Because you don’t believe you matter there will never be […]
People have opinions. In fact, they have lots of opinions. And don’t worry, their opinions include judgements about what you should and shouldn’t do. Don’t let their judgements stop you. Instead you must listen to the inside of you. Give your opinion more weight than you do other people’s judgement. Last fall, I was helping […]