I’ve just returned from one of those life big moments.
My husband was inducted in the American Swim Coaches Hall of Fame for his body of work over the past 34 years, developing 2 Olympians ,1 Paralympian, and thousands of others.
Over the years I’ve been on “both sides of the curtain.” On the outside looking into other people’s lives and trying to figure out “what’s the secret to their success?” And I’ve been on the inside of success, not realizing that most of the time I was living this “successful life others saw” … while getting knocked down a lot and trying to get back up.
The stories I’ve made up about those who have achieved great success looks something like this:
They had a golden path laid out before them. It was easy for them. They have always been well liked. They didn’t have any real obstacles. They were (and are) the chosen ones.
These are lies we tell ourselves in order to build a body of evidence as to why success is not possible for US.
Here’s what success really looks like, a behind-the-scenes of my husband’s 34 year career (as well as my own):
While there have been many high points through the years, the individual days have been hard. There have been more — many more than I care to remember — gut-wrenching moments. We have been some of the most hated in our community over the years. There were lots of boulder-sized obstacles to overcome when we were dead-ass tired, exhausted, and beaten down. And I’ve definitely believed I was a loser and that there was something wrong with us. Funny how my self-belief spread to both of us!
The next time you start to make up a story of someone else’s success (how easy it was for them to achieve that success) and then compare it to your own story … STOP.
This practice doesn’t serve you.
When we compare, we despair.
What we don’t see in those “success stories” are the fallen down moments, the boulder-sized obstacles, the hard days, the people who help us move through + the bravery to overcome one’s mindset and persevere … without any guarantee that the goal will be obtained.
This morning my husband left for work and said he was off to “chop, chop, haul, haul.” Throughout most of human history, the average life was spent in two activities … chopping wood and hauling water. He has done that hard work of chopping and hauling over the past 34 years. Success isn’t about an easy path for the chosen one. It’s about being brave, persistent, consistent, willing to overcome obstacles, doing the work, and having the support to help you get through the tough times.
No ONE achieves success without overcoming.
No ONE does it alone.
This is what it really looks like behind the scenes of a major success.
Don’t let what you think you see mislead you and sell yourself short.
Success, and the path to achieving it, are not something to fear. But even if you do, you CAN overcome it.
P.S. Ready to ditch the doubt & create a life you love? Join us here.