You’re in constant turmoil over what other people think about you, your choices + actions. You try to hide away so you aren’t seen + criticized. You don’t own your voice and speak your truth. You act the way you are supposed to act to gain other people’s approval. The problem … by worrying about what other […]
I should know how to do it. I’m so stupid. I can’t ever get it right. Sound familiar? Effective? Only if you want to continue to feel less confident of yourself. Remember we are all newbies in a global pandemic. You aren’t going to know how to do it, you’ll make mistakes not because your […]
Your biggest fear is what other people say about you. So you hustle for others to approve of you. You tell other people what you believe they want to hear. You do what other people want you to do. In fact you spend so much time and energy trying to control what other people say […]
The right way is a show stopper, especially during this time of COVID-19. My clients are often trying to figure out the right way to: Parent Be a friend Find their next life partner Figure out the next chapter in their career Make decisions during this time of COVID-19 This right way only stalls them […]
MYTH: You can love others more than you love yourself. FACT: Your ability to love others is correlated to your ability to love yourself. Almost a decade ago I read this mind shattering fact in Brené Brown’s book The Gifts of Imperfection as I was preparing for my first interview with her. Her research showed […]
How often are you seeking the wisdom of others? Of course I would be hypocritical if I told you … you’re not supposed to seek out others wisdom. As the host of the How She Really Does It podcast since 2006, I’ve done several hundred interviews with other people … seeking out their wisdom. […]
Recently, I was hiking along the beautiful Amalfi Coast. Actually, I was hiking alongside a cliff. There were lots of rocks and rubble. The interesting thing was that the paths most walked were well-worn and also the most slippery + dangerous. This is a great metaphor for life. How often are the paths most walked […]
My client was in tears. I asked her, “Do you want to fit in … or belong.” Her response surprised me. “I want to fit in.” Fitting in is an attempt at making yourself who you think others want you to be. Belonging is showing up fully as your complete messy + lovable self. She […]
You don’t want to be selfish. You’ve been taught — or rather, culturally programmed — in order to be a good enough wife and mother you must put everyone else ahead of YOU. In fact, your teens are more than happy to ensure this message on a daily basis. At work, your supposed to be […]
Two types of leadership. Growing up…there weren’t many female leaders I knew about. On TV the leaders were men. While I had female leaders in the classroom and a powerful force of a mother, until college all of my swimming coaches had been male. I was culturally programmed to not value my mother and the […]