I had it all wrong. I thought I had to be better than I could possibly be. I thought I had to achieve great success. I thought I had to be perfect. Then, if I could achieve all of these things, I’d be loved. I would finally be worthy of love + belonging. The thing […]
My client used busy as a status symbol for happiness. If she was busy, she thought, she could prove to others she was worthy … and therefore would be happy. Sure, busy fills up that vulnerable white space we covet, but are so afraid of because we are then alone with ourselves. If you don’t […]
“What’s wrong with me?” “Why am I not doing what I should be doing?” Two reasons there’s a gap between what you know and what you do: The questions above lead to self-hatred … which is rooted in the feeling of SHAME. When rooted in SHAME, you either hide away or beat the crap out […]
What if you committed to one personal development book for a year? This means you, read the entire book, re-read it again and used it as a resource. You would have to actually apply the information you read and USE the nuggets of wisdom. Where would you be in 12 months? What I know for […]
I’m not appreciated. I often hear this from clients when they are verbal vomiting the painful stories in their head about an area they are struggling with. A magic trick I have to stop the vomit is to ask “how does it serve you to believe you are not appreciated.” The immediate answer, It doesn’t […]
Your biggest fear is what other people say about you. So you hustle for others to approve of you. You tell other people what you believe they want to hear. You do what other people want you to do. In fact you spend so much time and energy trying to control what other people say […]
I have several clients who are strong independant, intelligent women. They are badass leaders in their professional lives. They support so many people, communities and help others rise up. They have created a life where they are not dependent on anyone. They have financial resources to take care of them. Many of them have chosen […]
I’m rather fortunate. I’m a female born in the United States of America. While my family was poor, I was always safe and out of harm’s way from the dangers of the world. Today, as a middle-aged woman, I live in an affluent, educated, + relatively safe community. I realize I’m lucky compared to so […]
As a kid growing up in a lot of shame, I did not believe I belonged. As an adult, it’s important for me to create environments of inclusive cultures. The theme song of my life is from the television show Cheers. I have cultivated the AquaMonsters to be a place of belonging. Our team motto […]
It has been a while since I posted. Summer has been full and busy. Now school has started for the kids, fall is on it’s way and life has quieted down a bit. I hope your summer was fabulous. Mine was amazing, full and busier then ever. I will be posting some of the things […]