You can’t act with confidence when you hate yourself. That would not be confidence, it would be a lie. Let’s look at the definition of confidence: the state of feeling certain about the truth of something. a feeling of self-assurance arising from one’s appreciation of one’s own abilities or qualities. the feeling or belief that […]
ALERT: You are an adult. You no longer need someone else’s permission. You can give yourself permission. Stop waiting for someone else to give you permission to DO, to BE, to HAVE what you want. As an adult you get to do that. Give yourself permission to: Ask for what you want. Make a mistake. […]
I didn’t swim to get inducted to the Hall of Fame I didn’t swim to swim in college. I didn’t swim for awards. I swam because I loved being in the pool. I swam because it was fun. I swam because it felt so good. I continued to swim, because I had a place to […]
I know better. I don’t even use the word PERFECT in my daily vocabulary. I notice it when other people use the word. I remember the impossible standards I created with that word. I let it go….. But perfectionism is sneaky. While I own my entire me. While I am my authentic + messy self. […]
My friend, you’ve been lied to … “Want a better life?” “Beat the crap out of yourself and you’ll get there.” That might ignite some better behavior from you. But then two things happen: Once your adrenaline runs out, this new behavior doesn’t last. Because you learn “it doesn’t really work,” next time you don’t […]
My clients work hard. They consider themselves high-achievers. In fact, they take that high achieving and over do it when they don’t believe they are worthy. Worthy of what you ask? Worthy of love. Worthy of belonging. Worthy of simply being enough. This is when my clients dial up this awful feeling of shame and […]
On my podcast you may have heard me say … Be the LEADER of your life. This is one of my main messages for my clients, the listeners of How She Really Does It and you here reading this. Being the leader of your life is part of what I call “adulting.” When we were […]
On the outside…you look like you have it all. On the outside…you look like you know what you are doing. On the outside…you appear to be so nice. That is to everyone else but YOU. Instead you beat yourself up. Internally, you demand that you BE better. You demand that you DO better. STOP IT, […]
I love this quote by Dolly Parton … “Find out who you are and do it on purpose.” Our biggest fear is if someone really gets to know us, they’ll realize we aren’t really good enough + they won’t like us. So the easy thing is to become who you think other people want you […]
We used to have a Borders bookstore in Davis. One of my favorite things to do on a date night was head over to the bookstore after our dinner. I didn’t have a clue where my husband headed. I always headed for the self-help section. The idea of self-help was enticing. It was my way, […]