You’re in constant turmoil over what other people think about you, your choices + actions. You try to hide away so you aren’t seen + criticized. You don’t own your voice and speak your truth. You act the way you are supposed to act to gain other people’s approval. The problem … by worrying about what other […]
“What’s wrong with me?” “Why am I not doing what I should be doing?” Two reasons there’s a gap between what you know and what you do: The questions above lead to self-hatred … which is rooted in the feeling of SHAME. When rooted in SHAME, you either hide away or beat the crap out of yourself. This […]
The path to growth is being comfortable with the uncomfortable. I can not change what I do not acknowledge. I am unpacking my own internal racial biases. I am listening. Desiree Adaway Ibram X. Kendi Rachel Cargie Austin Channing Brown Erika Hines I am continuing to learn. White Fragility: Why It’s So Hard for White […]
I should know how to do it. I’m so stupid. I can’t ever get it right. Sound familiar? Effective? Only if you want to continue to feel less confident of yourself. Remember we are all newbies in a global pandemic. You aren’t going to know how to do it, you’ll make mistakes not because your […]
Your biggest fear is what other people say about you. So you hustle for others to approve of you. You tell other people what you believe they want to hear. You do what other people want you to do. In fact you spend so much time and energy trying to control what other people say […]
There’s a lot of uncertainty in our world right now. With the uncertainty is a lot of information, worry, + panic. Our brains are quickly processing all the information and we have thousands upon thousands of thoughts running through our brain. Many of us are experiencing anxiety. According to Dr. Harriet Lerner, we deal with […]
Last week, one of my clients told me, “my feelings aren’t valid unless someone else takes them seriously.” Is that ABSOLUTELY true? Before we go any further. The answer is YES or NO. I know that will trigger a lot of …”but Koren …” Let’s try this again. Is it ABSOLUTELY true that your feelings […]
The right way is a show stopper, especially during this time of COVID-19. My clients are often trying to figure out the right way to: Parent Be a friend Find their next life partner Figure out the next chapter in their career Make decisions during this time of COVID-19 This right way only stalls them […]
I have several clients who are strong independant, intelligent women. They are badass leaders in their professional lives. They support so many people, communities and help others rise up. They have created a life where they are not dependent on anyone. They have financial resources to take care of them. Many of them have chosen […]
MYTH: You can love others more than you love yourself. FACT: Your ability to love others is correlated to your ability to love yourself. Almost a decade ago I read this mind shattering fact in Brené Brown’s book The Gifts of Imperfection as I was preparing for my first interview with her. Her research showed […]