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People pleasing sounds like a good thing …

People pleasing sounds like a good thing …

A number of years ago, a thoughtful, long-time listener sent me an email.

She asked me to consider to stop using the term “approval whore.” She believed it was demeaning.

Over the next few months, I percolated on her email.  

While I understood her point of view, I also came to realize exactly why I’d continue to use the phrase approval whore.

People pleasing sounds like a good thing.

When I think about people pleasing, the little voice in my head says “Really, what’s wrong with people pleasing? Isn’t it a better way to be?”

Instead, when I use the term approval whore my whole brain wakes up and I am conscious of what I’m doing.

I’m no longer willing to sell myself out for the approval for others.

As a recovering approval whore, people pleasing is way too nice a phrase. And for me, I’ll lose my way.

Instead, I thank my long-time listener for her email.

She helped me get clear about why this phrase is so valuable for me, and why I’ll continue to use “approval whore,” instead of giving in to that little people pleaser inside my brain.

smiling,

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Hello, I am Koren. I am a real person just like you.  I practice living my life in alignment with who I am, even if that means I am different. I show up and do the work too! I am okay and so are you. I am a mother, wife, family member, friend, entrepreneur and community builder ... learn more

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