We all love Brené Brown’s message (well, except for a few people like my husband). When she speaks about vulnerability, it sounds amazing.
However, to actually live it is another thing.
It really kind of sucks. It’s uncomfortable. It’s messy. It takes time. It takes courage. It isn’t easy. And we often do it wrong – we overshare with people who haven’t earned the right to hear our story and are NOT safe listeners.
But when you do vulnerability, really do it … it’s transformative + empowering.
I was coaching my client today and she said, “Oh, last week was sooo hard and I’m so grateful to have been doing this work with you.”
The days last week were challenging:
- In her marriage, as her husband struggles with his own worthiness
- With her best friend, who is having a tough time at work (like most people do)
- With a good friends, who are doing their best to support their family as they overcome their own obstacles
She was surrounded by lots of people struggling in their lives. People she loves dearly and who are also on her support team.
The week was consumed with lots of draining energy. Lots of courageous conversations. Lots of emotions she used to numb with food.
But remember I said … she has done her work and is willing to be vulnerable. She checked in with the stories in her head and showed up compassionately for herself and for those she cares about.
Prior to our coaching partnership, she used to believe taking care of herself was selfish. She believed she didn’t have the time and wasn’t important enough to spend the time + money on herself, feeling it was self-indulgent.
Today she spoke her truth to me.
When I feel good about myself, I’m a better wife.
When I feel good about myself, I’m a better friend.
When I feel good about myself, I’m a better mother.
When I feel good about myself, I’m able to do excellent work and support my family well!
AND … when I’m in that awful place, I’m good for no one!
When I’m my own best friend, I can have a week like last week and know I am ENOUGH.
When I’m my own best friend, I know we all have difficult issues and I can be the support for those that need me.
I’m grateful for becoming my own best friend, as I have so much to give others now.